Thursday, April 26, 2018

A movie rummage table with Over the Top

Well, once again I have gone off on a complete tangent while writing my latest post and since this part has become way too long to be workable - and most of it is an unscheduled review of the 80s classic Over The Top with Sylvester Stallone - I have decided to revive my MOVIE RUMMAGE TABLE series since you can get this for a few bucks and do a spin off post.


Now I´m not saying it´s Oscar material or a lost cineastic gem but I feel that the movie has gotten a kind of bad rep and very much undeservedly.

Here in Germany there is currently the Cannon - Lernwoche at one of the tv stations where they are kind of trying to make fun of Cannon Films. At the same time they are trying to cash in on the fact that Cannon movies are still popular or at least people still want to see them. And as much as Today´s Millenials might be wrinkling their noses at these productions as somebody who went to movie theaters in the 80s and 90s I know that Cannon movies gave the public what they wanted. Not those films that are so much in vogue now with everybody talking about their feelings and everybody being politically and socially aware and important topics. Nope.

What people wanted to see was an easy story with a plot that you can follow where good wins over bad and the good guy is kind of stoic and solves his problems by punching - or shooting - people. Or doing both.


And Sylvester Stallone was kind of predestined for this because what he lacked in articulation he made up for in on - screen - presence and action. He may not be as big of a superstar Today as he was back then and one thing people forget is that he started out living in a trailer park and made it to being one of the biggest stars in Hollywood. When Sylvester wrote the script for the first Rocky movie his wife was pregnant and he had to provide for his family so when he declined the 300.000 the studio offered for the script and insisted on playing the title role everybody thought he was crazy. The same thing happened when he decided to direct Rocky II but that was more out of necessity because the studio executives wanted Rocky to start taking drugs and have sex with bitches - you know the usual Hollywood cliches to show how broken a certain character is because that makes them interesting - and Stallone knew that was not Rocky Balboa.


Now granted, not all of his movies are that well remembered now but with a few of them the general perception of it has changed. I remember when Fist - the movie he made about the beginnings of the trade unions - came out all of the critics saw it as another Stallone movie where he plays a guy who earns his place in the world with his fists. Now whenever it is on tv the television guide files it under interesting and accurate study of the beginnings of the trade unions with an oustanding Sylvester Stallone.

Which brings us to Over The Top. Here we have tropes like the underdog father - nobody plays an underdog like Sylvester Stallone - who is a truck driver and who suddenly has to try to reconnect with an estranged son. As it could not be any other way his wife dies and his stepfather who is wealthy to the whazoo wants to get custody of Stallone´s son. The only way to win enough money to be able to care for his son is winning the World Armwrestling Championship and hijinks ensue. Now the movie goes through all of the paces you expect from such a movie and it gets corny and old fashioned and far fetched but I think that is one of the strong points of it. Yes, we already know how the movie is going to end but in this case the journey is more important than the destination. I mean who wouldn´t want Sylvester Stallone as his father ( remember, he´s Rocky, Rambo and the City Cobra ) and it´s not easy making an action packed movie about such a static sport like arm wrestling. The movie title is really the mission statement here because this film is over the top in every way.

So for me this is a movie that I like to watch once in a while. I don´t know if it is nostalgia or if I just generally like a few Stallone movies that most people don´t like. I mean, even though I already knew the plot from the original with Louis De Funes I enjoyed Oscar. Okay, there are some movies that are not that good and I´m sure making Rhinestone had less to do with his agent telling him if he would not do it Arnold Schwarzenegger would do it and more with two reasons his co - star Dolly Parton provided.


I mean, who wouldn´t want to work with an actress whose titanic twin torpedoes ( which have been reported anything from 38CC to 48DD ) hold the world record for a woman with the biggest breasts in a non r - rated movie for Nine To Five ? It is not known what went on between those two but according to Sylvester Stallone the most fun he had on a movie was with Dolly Parton on Rhinestone and Dolly Parton also said Stallone was fun to work with, nuts, sick, crazy, a scream - as well as pretty to look at.

What is known is that Sylvester Stallone did a lot of rewrites on the script in an attempt to bring more dark humor into the movies and he may have added more than just a few steamy sex scenes with Dolly. After shooting Sly spent most nights " rehearsing " those scenes with Dolly in her trailer and it is well known that Sylvester is a method actor. So for most of the shooting they had their special midnight olympics and it is not known if those scenes would have ended up in the movie or if Stallone just put them into the script he gave Dolly so he could bang her brains out because a new director came in who changed everything. In any case who could blame Sylvester Stallone for trying to tame a living sex dream like Dolly ?  


With a first name that is short for blow up sex doll and the corresponding body she was predestined for a career in porn movies and it is all the more astounding that she managed to have a clean and wholesome image. But if there ever was a woman born to play a whorehouse matron in a musical it´s Dolly Parton and it´s a crying shame she never got to play Power Girl.


Speaking of women who should have portrayed Power Girl, one who is no longer with us is Playmate Of The Year 1993 Anna Nicole Smith who was a prime candidate for my Search For Power Girl series at my old boob blog.


She did get naked in her PLAYBOY videos and the skin flicks Skyscraper and To The Limit but I would have loved to see her giant gazongas in a movie with Dolly Parton. That would have been pure double D heaven. It could have been a spin - off from The Best Little Whorehouse In Texas with Dolly Parton as the Mom and Anna Nicole Smith as the nymphomanic daughter.


The story could have been the usual where they try to leave their lives as prostitutes behind and go to a new town. Then one of their old customers finds them out and blackmails them into becoming the new town whores.


And after a few nude scenes where they are used and abused by drunken perverts in any way imaginable so that you get your full money´s worth of having ultimate blow up sex dolls Anna Nicole Smith and Dolly Parton in the movie by showing every inch of their spectacular bodies they finally manage to turn the tables - which of course includes using their porn star bodies to seduce the bad guys with even more hardcore sex - and escape.


Apropos the Maid of Mammaries, in 2016 I managed to do another post about Darick Robertson in which I mentioned the BREAKDOWNS storyline that introduced Power Girl´s famous coconut bra costume. And I just got to say that I still have not given up on a Yaya Han Power Girl coconut bra cosplay ( with the tiniest coconut shells you can find although compared to her huge 40D oppai all coconut shells look small no matter how big they are ) as she has already shown that she does a terrific Power Girl cosplay and she has no problem filling out the magical cleavage window. 


So far I had written five posts on Yaya - two of them are pretty safe but the other three are absolutely not safe for work - and I keep mentioning her on various JLA casting posts and any other posts involving asian sexbombs like Kiana Tom, Ava Cadell, Akira Lane, Miko Lee, Gail Kim or Minka and I swear the completely NSFW BIG YAYA HAN POST is still in the pipeline. In the meantime I have made two new posts about Yaya which showcases a part of her anatomy that I have ignored too often - her legs.


One reason why Miko Lee kept popping up in the posts about Yaya Han is that I needed a body double for Yaya´s more explicit scenes I had in mind.


Which is not ideal since Yaya Han has a 40D bust and Miko Lee is nowhere near in that league. Thankfully it looks like hasian talk show host Jeannie Mai is auditioning for the part and while she also is a bit smaller than Yaya in the chest area she does have an impressive skill set. I am convinced.


This hot sexbomb is of vietnamese descend and even though she is " only " a 37C and not a 40D like Yaya Han I think she could be a body double for those explicit scenes. At least it would be fun to put her body to the test on the casting couch. I have finally found all the episodes of Snoop Dogg presents The Joker´s Wild and hot daimn, Jeannie Mai is spectacular !!! 


By the way, if you are looking online for pictures of Jeannie Mai do not be surprised if you come across somebody who might look slightly familiar.

Because on the React videos there is also a hasian with the name Jeannie Mai - Jeannie Elise Mai to be exact - and besides starring in everybody´s favorite YouTube channel she apparently has done some model shootings.


I tried to verify it and came across a page that has a plethora of pictures of all the Teens React girls - some of whom even I was not aware of. In any case, there were so many pics that I will have to go over the site another day but here I am feeling guilty about posting a few animated GIFs about the lovely react babes and there are websites out there with a truckload of pictures. Man, I was thinking if I should continue posting the videos at all and now I´m finding out that I´m the least pervy guy on the internet.


Since we have kind of a bonus post I want to go with a little Sylvester Stallone theme for the first two videos and we start with Angel of the City from official soundtrack to Cobra or how it was called in Germany The City Cobra. This was back when Brigitte Nielsen was still do - able. By the way, can anybody deny or confirm if there actually was a She Hulk movie ?



Next we have the Nostalgia Critic reviewing Demolition Man and coming to the conclusion that without knowing it the movie makers did a pretty accurate depiction of the future and guess what ? It´s the future we are currently living in with twitter, tumblr and SJWs. If you haven´t seen it you must check it out - it also features Sandra Bullock back when she was hot - and if you HAVE already seen it maybe you want to watch it again. Like Angel Heart this is not the same movie if you watch it a second time.



Finally a video with a woman who is still hot right now. There are a few videos from this show on YouTube but this was the only one where you can see some of the good parts with Jeannie Mai. I think the show had a second season but without Jeannie Mai which defeats the purpose IMHO.



Because one of the questions from the clip above is about Rihanna having a tattoo of a certain egyptian goddess on her body I thought this would be a good idea to post another episode of Isis but since we already had a movie review and something from tv I wanted to go with a cartoon. Now there is Freedom Force but I already posted a video from that. I also already posted the first episode from the Rambo cartoon ( yes, there really was a RAMBO cartoon ) so to keep the motif of horsepowers going our last two videos are of the immensly popular 80s franchise M.A.S.K.



I didn´t get much into it but I know my brother was a huge fan and he bought all the german M.A.S.K. comic - some of which had art by the legendary team of Curt Swan and Kurt Schaffenberger. In America only 14 issues were made but the series was so popular over in the UK that their version ran for 80 issues. So when the german M.A.S.K. magazine ran out of US material they just continued with the UK comics. For some strange reason there is no entry in the Deutscher Comic Guide for this series but according to the Grand Comic Book Database the Bastei Verlag continued with the german M.A.S.K. magazine until issue 28. I thought of tracking down the UK comics ( no pun intended ) as a present for my brother but now that he has moved into a new house and is getting rid of big parts of his comic book collection I don´t know if that is still such a good idea.



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