Saturday, January 10, 2015

Movie cult siren Janet Jones re - posted

Today Janet Jones Gretzky celebrates her 54th birthday so I thought it´s time to re - post her entry. The plan was to re- post the entire post and pimp the original post with some GIFs I had made the last few weeks.

But I guess that it´s true what they say about the best laid plans of men and mice because after adding all the GIFs the strain was too big and the page did not load completely anymore. So I had to cut a lot of stuff and pictures. Thankfully I had saved the original post which I restored and as there was too much I had to cut for this version this has turned into the re - posted version which is mainly about Janet Jones. I will probably have to do three new posts : one for Janet Jones, one of Leslie Easterbrook and one for Becky Mullen which will concentrate on the part about them although it will incorporate stuff about the others. I´m not sure to which extent until I have finished them but you can find the original post here .

The post about Janet Jones started as a way to give props to one of the unsung heroines that transform otherwise unwatchable b - movies into bearable entertainment. It was also a possibility for me to talk about the POLICE ACADEMY movie franchise and a whole lot of other stuff. Janet is of course best known for appearing in POLICE ACADEMY 5 - ASSIGNMENT MIAMI BEACH in a stunning white swimsuit presenting her best assets and she´s one of the reasons people still watch the movie. Or at least wait for the parts with her in them to be over before zapping to something else.

Nowadays nobody really watches the complete movies anymore because thanks to a seemingly neverending number of sequels Hollywood has managed to completely ruin the franchise. I remember seeing the first one in the theater and coming out pretty overwhelmed because at that time it was really a novel concept. And I still think the first part holds up pretty well. Not that it´s the big cinematographic gem but it´s funny and entertaining if you haven´t seen the gags repeated in the other sequels. It sure launched a few careers since it brought Steve Guttenberg a big career boost and gave Bubba Smith and Michael Winslow their big break.

Although I have to confess I´m not sure what Michael Winslow is doing right now. I know he did some really bad german movies starring Thomas Gottschalk and written by Thomas Gottschalk ( who else would cast Thomas Gottschalk in a movie who didn´t owe him a favor ? ) but also better stuff like SPACEBALLS and ROBOT CHICKEN. Steve Guttenberg was pretty big in the 80s and 90s but to the current generation he´s probably best known for playing corrupt town mayor Woody Goodman on VERONICA MARS with the lovely Kristen Bell in the lead role of plucky successor to Nancy Drew, Veronica Mars. I guess I just appeared on all search engines because I mentioned Kristen Bell.

Speaking about VERONICA MARS, Charisma Carpenter also has a part on the show who is of course best known for playing Cordelia on BUFFY and later on ANGEL. Which brings us to Enrico Colantoni, who plays ex - sheriff / ex - private eye / new sheriff Keith Mars and he also was on an episode of BONES which is the new series of David Boreananz who plays FBI agent Seely Booth and who also played Angel first on BUFFY and then on ANGEL. And Kim Catrall - who later on had more SEX AND THE CITY - also appeared in the first POLICE ACADEMY movie. Like I said, it was pretty good but with each sequel the quality has gotten worse and worse and the only good parts were the ones with hot babes like Janet Jones who is the only reason anybody can suffer through these pieces.

The other reason is Leslie Easterbrook who plays megabusty police officer Debbi Callahan Callahan and had her best scene in POLICE ACADEMY 4 - CITIZENS ON PATROL where she was in a pool with a wet t - shirt .

There have been some requests for HQ GIFs of the scene but these are the best I could find. If you find any in better quality please let me know.

Leslie Easterbrook´s secondbest clip is in POLICE ACADEMY 5 when she´s on the plane and two boys stare at her cleavage thinking her fast asleep. If you pay attention you see how she first yells at them. But then when they try to check her out again you can see her flashing a proud grin and pushing her boobs up a bit so they can get a good eyeful of her melons.

Which shows what a sense of humor Callahan has and that despite everything she´s still proud of her quite distracting breasts .

She probably got that from Leslie Easterbrook, the voluptuous actress who portrays Callahan and appears in most of the POLICE ACADEMY movies, who seems like the kind of actress I’d love to have lunch with. She knows exactly what kind of movies she’s in, and plays the part with a vicious commitment unseen in most comedies of this ilk. She’s perfectly o.k. with being objectified and in interviews seems amused and tickled at some of the things she’s had to do. Pragmatic, flirty, professional and practical, Easterbrook is one of the stars of the POLICE ACADEMY series and may well be one of the women who influenced my fixation on confident blondes with big breasts that kick ass like Power Girl.

Leslie´s Callahan was kind of empowering for women, she was strong, intelligent, kick - ass tough as nails, independent and secure in her sexuality. Physically she was superior to most men who came across as rather stupid and one - minded most often suffering - or inflicting upon others - heavy injury while being distracted by her centerfold curves.

Like in the scene where this poor guy almost chokes to death because the beefcake who is supposed to be spotting him is checking her out instead.

He´s like totally transfixed by sexbomb Callahan spreading her legs wide open again and again and is probably thinking about what a world class breeding mare like her could do with a horny stud in his sexual prime.

Callahan was the hunter and all others were the prey.

Now back to playmate Janet Jones Gretzky who was a few times on the cover and inside of PLAYBOY magazine

and yes, she that famous icehockey player´s wife.

As her appearances in the pages of PLAYBOY have proven she´s one hot masssita and since she looks absolutely boobielicious in a swimsuit she takes over Leslie Easterbrook´s part as eye candy - at least partially. In an X - Men movie I would cast Janet as Dazzler.

Or she could play my favorite X - Girl Tabitha Smith a.k.a. Boom Boom ( because of her big Boom Booms ) since they could be twin sisters.

And so you can get idea what that would look like here are some screencaps from POLICE ACADEMY 5 - ASSIGNMENT MIAMI BEACH with Janet Jones in a white swimsuit or just watch the movie. And if you do don´t be surprised to see Rene Auberjonois as the villain who also played Odo on STAR TREK - DEEP SPACE NINE.

Janet Jones, whose film credits include BEASTMASTER, STAYING ALIVE, THE FLAMINGO KID, A CHORUS LINE, AMERICAN ANTHEM and A LEAGUE OF THEIR OWN also did a workout video where she wears a white suit. 

White really is her colour. I guess I would have bought her workout tape and I wouldn´t have regretted it from the short clips I was able to watch.

Janet really shows her best parts ( like her perfectly sculpted ass !!! ) and in some instances there is some nipplage visible through the thin fabric.

The tape is available through amazon so there still must be some demand for it. I´m not sure who can play it since the only way to get something equipped with a VCR is one of these combo machines that have a DVD player and those are going out of style as everything is Blue Ray now.

We´re starting Today´s video section with a video that should have been in the original post. But back then I only put two videos - at the most - in a post and there were not as many videos of Janet Jones Gretzky on YouTube as Today. As you will see when you watch this in a separate window. Anyway, here is Janet with her famous aerobic video.

I also wanted to put this in the original Janet Jones Gretzky post : Michael Winslow and his famous rendition of Jimi Hendrix´s PURPLE HAZE.

I also couldn´t fit this in the original post - and at the time there were no good videos of this on YouTube. So here is the dreaded POLICE ACADEMY cartoon ( I think this is from the 2nd season ), watch it at your own risk.

Okay, the military and the police are not quite the same but I didn´t find a video about the police. And Tackleberry behaves like it was anyway.

Last but not least here´s a woman who easily could have given Leslie Easterbrook a run for her money in the boobs departement when she was in her prime. The police in Australia is searching for a pair of gas station muggers, a man and a woman called " the big breasted bandit ". Can you guess what her distinguishing features are ? I don´t know if crime does pay but it has a nice rack. I bet she´ll get a full cavity search upon arrest.

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